Many people call shyness a disease. But shyness isn’t your ordinary herpes, it’s a social "disease." According to Psychology Today (February 2000), approximately 48% of the population suffers from shyness. Unfortunately, most people would rank it at the bottom of the list in order of importance, even below a headache. A headache can go away within minutes, but shyness can last forever. What if every time you tried to talk to someone, your heart would pound, you would blush, butterflies would swarm your stomach, your hands would start to sweat, you would tremble and as if it weren’t bad enough, you would lose your breath and never get words out? This sounds more difficult to deal with than an everyday headache, don’t you think? This often paralyzing fear of speaking to people may live inside of you. But hey, you can always e-mail. First of all, we now live in an age where much of our communication is via e-mail and instant messages. When this form of communication was first established, most people thought it was perfect. We get the opportunity to keep in touch with long distance friends and keep our phone bills reasonable. The only real problem we saw was that it wasn’t as personal as spending time with that friend. Nevertheless, e-mail and instant messaging open a path of communication, especially for shy people. The more popular the Internet became, the more it began to replace in-person meetings and phone conversations. Our lives began to revolve around this form of communication and, for shy people, it was all we could ask for. We received a chance to express deeper feelings to people. We said things that we would hesitate or be too afraid to say in person, and it was almost as if we were living vicariously through other persons, except that those persons were us behind a computer screen. Sure, the shy people were getting their chance to shine, but what happens when the person at the other side of the computer screen wants to hear this from you in person? You may feel as though, through e-mail, you are expressing your true feelings and saying things you’ve always wanted to say, yet never could. But by hiding behind a computer screen, you are, in many ways, hiding yourself. The only way to work on your shyness, is to accept it. So don't allow yourself to backspace or close out the box, just bring up the topic in front of that person. You should want to bring up the topic when you’re standing two feet away from the person, so that you can’t just backspace a mistake or close out the box if you feel uncomfortable. So every time you send out an e-mail proclaiming your love for your best friend, realize that, by succumbing to e-mail, you’re just hiding yourself. And when you see him or her, the friend will expect you to follow through with the e-mail. Don’t leave it so you have to live up to something. It will just put you a step behind. Chances are he or she will probably find the heart-pounding, face-blushing honesty you have to offer real. Just tell the friend in person, so you can be yourself, as pink and flustered as that may be.
by Tiffany
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